True Feelings in 2012

Over the past month I feel like I have looked at things in the world a lot differently. I see how divided our country is, a place that is suppose to be the land of the free, the equal  and people living The AMERICAN DREAM.

I believe in me and what I stand for. I was blessed with a very outspoken personality and I will never be ashamed of it. That saying, "If you stand for nothing, you'll fall for anything" is really ringing a lot of bells for me. We'll never live in a world where everyone will like one another or agree on every matter we come across. I ranted in February about Black History month and where I feel my culture is going and the issues I have with the way people are so I will not dwell on that anymore. I said it and all I can do is pray and actively make a difference with things I see going wrong. I am only one person but I know I make a difference to people I deal with in my life.

I have a passion for working with teenagers but it isn't something I want to do as a career. I like to be a mentor and a support system to those around me. No, I'm not rich I can't financially help people but what I am is an honest and genuine person. I want the best for anyone I know. I am the biggest cheerleader for all who are near to me, it just comes naturally ;-)

It saddens me to see how quick people can be to put others down, especially when they are acting in their best interest. We live in a world where we are too quick to judge people, especially someone we don't know, in my opinion your only slighting yourself.

Respect is another thing that has gone out the window. I come in contact with people that I know have no respect for the people around them, it disgusts me, I had to learn how to deal with that. How? I act like they don't exist. If I don't exist, neither do you. I keep my mouth shut, I pray they keep theirs shut and we keep it moving.

I guess this is the part of me saying I have tough skin. Yes I cry, I am the biggest crybaby! My older brother has told me that for as long as I remember. I don't mind, though. Once my tears have been shed I feel like a weight is lifted off me. It is my way of coping with anger, fear, pain and sometimes happiness.

Currently, our country is currently debating over the killing of Trayvon Martin. I have expressed my opinions numerous times and they still remain the same. All I want to say in this situation is there is wrong and there is right. There are 3 sides to every story and in this case we will only hear one becasue the other person can no longer speak for themself and there are no witnesses to tell the truth. There is video out of George Zimmerman after the "altercation" he says he had with Martin, looking as if nothing was wrong. No blood, no ripped shirt, no broken nose... I can go on. Things like this happen way too much and there has to come a time when injustices like this stop. That city is crying for help because Trayvon Martin isn't the first and unfortunately he won't be the last. Don't fight for race, fight for equality. I already know what it is, I don't need anyone to tell me differently. My eyes and ears are open! 

Going With the Flow :-)

So lately I have been getting to my blogs at the end of the month. Thank goodness for the leap year becasue I have an extra day to get something up here this month.

Sooo whats new!? Not too much... as I tell everyone else same 'ol ish, just a different day. BUT things are GREAT! I have learned to realize things will never go as planned, no matter how much I try. I take things day by day and being happy with where I am at, at the moment is all I need. I can't worry about the days that haven't come.

My freelance writing has really been taking off. My editor has been throwing me stories every chance she gets. I have always wanted to pursue being a freelance writer along with being a journalist and I am proud to have started that part of my career. It keeps me positive and I feel good about the work that I do. I'll have to post links to my stories on here once they are published. Everything is about community and the positives things going on in the Western Pennsylvania region.

In other news:

My job search is still ongoing {BLAH}. Yea I'm so over it but giving up like I always say is JUST NOT AN OPTION!!! I know God has something in the works for me and it really sucks being on the side of not knowing. I seriously think I give God a show with my anticipation. I know he laughs at me... I can say the darndest things lol. He is making me stronger, though it seems like the finish line is so far away. I see the light but it's still in the distance. When I need it I always have my Angels on earth. The write words, text, email, or phone call always seems to make its way to me right when I need it. Because He is always on time :-) I heard some news that I didn't want to hear but I took it with a grain of salt. Knowing it wasn't me or anything I did for the outcome that came to be helped me get through the news. I know the things that are happening for me are for a reason. The day I find out, I swear I'm going to do cartwheels everywhere I go!


Switching gears - (In my broadcaster voice) LoL

It's Pisces season!!! Let me tell you I LOVE me a Pisces. Some of the closest people to me are Pisces! They know who they are ;-) Happy Birthday to you all, I LOVE LOVE LOVE you soooo much. Thanks for being you XOXO (Dontae, Alicia, Shantell, Sydni G., & Ambuler)




February - Black History Month ( Yea I had to say something about it)

You know, I like to watch TV during Black History Month. There is always a good PBS documentary on or some show discussing Black History and it always amazes me how ignorant our society can be today.

So many people fought for our rights to have a voice and be proud of who we are as a race and so many people take those rights for granted. Of course something like jail or even death can take all of those rights away but it shouldn't have to come to that. It's clear we are an intelligent group of people and I hope to one day be able to make a big impact in the world because I feel we need to do better.

I had a conversation with one of my favorite Pisces friends (Alicia) and she was telling me about her marketing company, Pure Ambition, and why she wanted to start something up like this. One things she shared was how we were fortunate to grow up and have women who look just like us to impact our lives in such a major way. Unfortunately things like that aren't available to the youth anymore.

The saying, "It takes a village to raise a child," is so true to me. I was blessed to have parents keep me grounded along with men and women who helped to support me as I became a woman. At some point we have to get back to that. I just hope it is sooner than later.



So this was one of my random blogs. I don't really have a purpose or one idea I am trying to get across except, I'm going with the flow and do what make you happy. My immediate needs are always met because I serve an amazing God.

Happy New Year... What a month!

Well for starters can I say January has been quite a month!? Mostly good things ;-)

I hope to finally get that start on-air in the TV business that I have been working towards. My new resume reel is finished and all I need now is that opportunity to expand on my desire of being a journalist. Here is the YouTube Link:

Ashley Connor 2012 Reel

I'm truly proud of the product that I delivered on my new reel. One thing I do not like to do is brag, I like my work to speak for itself. I do a lot of things on my "off" time and this is a BIG reason why I am always so busy. Since none of my jobs involve me working on this part of my career I have to do it on my own time. It know it will all pay off one day. I did get the opportunity of having my first interview at a TV station about a week ago for Reporter/Producer job. I will say it went well and no matter what the outcome is I know I made an impression, it's up to God now if he feels that is where I should get my start. In the mean time I'll leave it all up to him.

I also received an email from my editor for the magazine I freelance for and she commended me on the improvement in my writing from when I started in September. It helped me realize the time I put in to perfect my craft is working. I take pride in the things that I do and I never want it to seem like I am "half assing" with my work.

Another great thing this month was being able to see my cousin, Donna. She is a reporter in Atlanta, GA and also one of the reason I want to pursue this career as a journalist. I look up to her so much and it's a blessing to have someone in this business that I know will be honest with me. She tells me things I may not want to hear but need to hear and keeps me on my toes. I haven't seen her in a couple of years so it was nice that we were able to see each other for a brief moment. It's motivation when someone who has had a career like Donna continues to encourage me and lets me know I can do this.

I've been told a number of times by my friends and family that 2012 is going to be my year. To me it is very cliche but those words I will say help me stay focused on my goal. I pray that 2012 will be a life changing year for me and although I know every moment won't bring a smile to my face it will add to the seasoned woman that I am. My trials and tribulations are not over and my pursuit to being a journalist is still underway. I welcome everything that this new year has to offer me. What I will do is stay encouraged.

My Journey: Goodbye 2011 >>>> Hello 2012

My Journey: Goodbye 2011 >>>> Hello 2012: Out with the old and in with the new! That seems to be the general mindset of most when a new year is upon us. Hence my urge to give my blog...

Goodbye 2011 >>>> Hello 2012

Out with the old and in with the new! That seems to be the general mindset of most when a new year is upon us. Hence my urge to give my blog a face lift. It works with my theme for this blog, "Out with the Old in with the NEW!" The last design wasn't me... so I fixed it! It is a work in progress but the look now is DEFINITELY more ME :-)

So..... how should I start this one? Of course! I have to reflect on this past year! I started this blog in March of this year and I must say it was ONE of my best decisions in 2011. I was able to show a different side of myself to those around me. The responses that I get from my blog are wonderful, I truly appreciate all of the words of encouragement. So first and foremost I thank whoever you are reading this right now. Your support is never unnoticed and little do you know when life gets hard I think of people like you, encouraging me to keep striving. I like to consider myself a pretty independent woman but I wouldn't be anything without God, my family and friends supporting me every step of the way. I couldn't thank you enough!

When I take the time to realize the wisdom I have gained this year alone, it amazes me! I'm nowhere near the Ashley I was a year ago and to anticipate the new lessons that 2012 will bring only makes me more eager to live life. I appreciate the good and bad in life because of the lesson(s) learned; it is a great aspect to living life. I'm only 24 and I am so sure of myself and what I want to do that I have a hard time being patient.

2011 has been a whirlwind! Filled with ups and downs, certainly the ups outweigh the downs. I gained new friends and let go of some of the old. I learned more than likely things will NOT go as planned and to only focus on the things I have control over. I gained a new outlook on perception and reality because there IS a BIG difference (That statement STILL hits me like I never heard it before). I also learned that I can't force things to happen, as much as I may try to move on something if it is not in God's plan there is nothing I can do but have patience and let time take its course. I have come a long way and I know I still have a ways to go, I'm on the right path though.

As we bring in 2012 I just want to say no matter what you do in your life at the end of the day YOU are your number one priority (unless you have a kid). Every decision you make has a consequence and whatever the consequence make sure you can handle it and you can look yourself in the mirror afterwards. If it doesn't feel right DO NOT DO IT! Be happy, Be healthy and BE YOU! Happy New Years!

This thing called, LIFE!

I'm excited!

About what?

Well my future of course! I have a lot of things going on in my life right now and as I have said before I know that God is truly guiding my steps. Things have been going great at work and I feel a lot of progress with everything I am doing. This weekend is going to be BIG. I'll be finishing up my new resume tape and pumping it out to TV stations all over the place.

My hunger for success is only growing and I am working hard continuously to make sure I don't lose sight of what the BIG picture is. It's amazing how God moves in my life and the people he has introduced me to in 2011. Most people that know me, know that I am not too open to just meeting random people and calling them my friends and forming a relationship with them outside of my work environment or wherever I come in contact with people at. What God has done to change my perspective with new people I come across is amazing. He knew what I needed. I'm where I am at today because this is what he has for me. Realizing that I am being prepared for something that I have no clue what it is makes me even more focused. I am open and ready to accept whatever is to come. I don't know when or how but I have faith that it's coming and God never lets me down.

The fact that it is December already is wild! This year flew by so fast... and from what I hear it only goes faster. This May will be three years since I graduated from Clarion and in June it will be seven since I graduated high school. Where did the time go? Those time frames right there are reason enough to make sure EVERYTHING I do has purpose and is getting me closer to my ultimate goal. I re-tweeted a tweet from a friend that said, "When things don't add up in your life, start subtracting". In 2011 I did A LOT of subtracting, I can't say that it was easy or I am done but the progress that I made this year was necessary and I couldn't be more at peace with life and the decisions I made.

My journey is far from over but I have to say the process is trying, scary and confusing but I'm learning every step of the way. I constantly evaluate the things I do in life and writing this blog has been a tremendous amount of help. I occasionally read through different blogs just to remember and learn from moments that I have had so far. Although things have been going good it take one second for things to go bad. I know it's going to happen and I welcome the bad times too.

I wouldn't be the person I am today if I didn't go through the things I have gone through.    
 

A sense of clarity

So my last blog that I attempted to write last week was deleted as I was finishing it up. Talk about PISSED OFF!! I literally prayed that it was saved and would come back... well that didn't happen. I then thought to myself well maybe that blog wasn't supposed to be shared and that was God's way of stopping me.

One thing about my blogs is that they come off the top of my head. When I sit down to write I always have a motive; there is some kind of message that I want to share but it is never complete. It works better for me to just type away and then go through everything and organize my random thoughts.

I am such a random person... I think of the oddest things at the most random times and more than likely if someone is around me I will let it all out. It's why I love to be able to come to my blog and just express myself. No holding back just telling you what I think and what is weighing on my heart. Take it or leave it... either way I don't care.

I couldn't begin to tell you where my last blog began and where it ended. I'm pretty sure this blog will entail a few things that were in my last blog because if I thought that way then I more than likely feel the same way today....